


Cancer

by Waya_Rainwater_1



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Adam is scared, Adam is sick with cancer, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-03
Updated: 2018-03-12
Packaged: 2019-03-26 06:20:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13851876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Waya_Rainwater_1/pseuds/Waya_Rainwater_1
Summary: Adam finds out that he has a rare type of cancer infecting not only his lungs but his throat too. he's afraid of what his friends might think, he keeps it a secret as long as he can until one day he starts coughing up blood in class and bursts out of the room with his friends coming after him.





	1. Chapter 1

Adam woke up that morning feeling really sweaty and hot. He’d been feeling sick over the past few weeks but decided to just sweat it out anyway, but this time he felt way too hot for it to be the flu. When he got up his ‘parts’ started to hurt a lot. Adam took his time to get dressed and only ten minutes later he was out the door. He felt really tired and as he was about to go down the stairs he missed a step and went tumbling down. Everything went blurry when he got up, there was a sharp pain in his cheek. He brought his hand up to touch it and found that he was bleeding. A nun had heard him tumbling not-so-gracefully down the stairs. 

“Are you okay Adam?” she asked with concern as she checked over my injury. 

“Yeah, just sick. I’m going to the hospital to see what kind of cold it is because I feel way too hot for it to be the flu” he told her with a weak smile. 

“Why don’t I drive you okay? You shouldn’t drive if you’re sick” she declared and helped him up. It was sunday and people were going to arrive any minute so they snuck out the back entrance with the nun helping Adam all the way to his car. Once the two got there he doubled over in a coughing fit. After it stopped he saw that his hand had some blood on it.

“I’ll call an ambulance, besides the traffic will be really bad if we drive there” the nun stated while getting out her phone. Adam didn’t want to argue so he nodded in understanding and slumped to the ground. He felt like he was going to throw up, Adam had read about these kind of symptoms in his science textbook. Fever, coughing up blood, dizziness, these were signs of cancer. He was scared, he didn’t want his friends to know about it unless it was confirmed that he had cancer. As his thoughts trailed off he could hear the sound of an ambulance which brought him back into focus of the real world. Paramedics came over to check on him and he doubled over again into a hysterical coughing fit. They put him onto a stretcher and wheeled him into the back of an ambulance. He fell asleep on the way there and had a nightmare of monsters attacking him on the inside of his veins. Adam became conscious a few hours later but his vision was a bit blurry. It gradually became clear over a few seconds, he heard a nurse come in with a breakfast tray. 

“Good afternoon Mr. Parrish! Did you sleep well?” the nurse asked cheerfully. He shook his head and when he did he found out that there was a tube sticking into his throat. He tried to speak but it didn’t go very well. 

“Don’t strain your voice Mr. Parrish, I’m very sorry to tell you this but… you have a very rare form of cancer” she said with a sad expression on her face. He frowned and started to tear up. Adam was afraid of that, he didn’t want to have cancer but understood what that meant. It meant that he was most likely to die, he wasn’t afraid of death he was just afraid of what came after it. Not being able to see his friends anymore, not being able to laugh and smile with them anymore, not being able to be with them anymore. No more birthday parties or celebrations with them, no more crying with them while watching a sad movie, no more anything. He wanted to spend as much time with them as he could, the nurse and doctor told them that he would have to go through a lot of chemotherapy and treatment if he wanted to get better and gave him the dates in which the appointments were. He nodded and wrote thank you on a notepad to tell them his thanks for telling him and helping him as much as they could after a few days. After that he went to the store and bought a beanie and scarf, the beanie was for when his hair started to fall out and the scarf was to hide the tube that was jutting out of his throat. Once he got home with the things he looked at himself in the mirror, he was already starting to lose hair. He decided to shave it off before his friends noticed that he was losing hair. Adam set his things on his bed then went into the bathroom, picked up a razor, and started to shave his head. Once he did that Adam put the beanie on to see how he looked, he didn’t look that bad, he actually looked kind of like a punk but a punk who had cancer. Tomorrow he would have to face his class and his friends, Adam was already dreading it. He took off the beanie and set it on his night stand then went to bed, but his mind was plagued with thoughts on what his friends would say. Would they freak out? What would they think? Will they not want to be around him anymore? Those thoughts stayed in his mind until he drifted off to sleep. 


	2. Chapter 2

Adam woke up to the sound of his alarm clock sounding that it was time for school. He turned it off and got ready for the day as he usually did but he was slower this morning with putting his shirt on because of the tube. He took a look in the mirror, he was bald and had a hole in his throat that was being occupied by a certain tube that looked really uncomfortable but he couldn’t feel it, he could see it but he couldn’t feel it. Adam grabbed his beanie and put it on, then snached his scarf and wrapped it around his neck and made sure to be careful of the stupid tube. After that he picked up his backpack and hoisted it onto his back then walked out the door. The nun that had helped him days before was standing at the bottom of the steps ready to help him out of the church. 

“How about I drive you to school today? I don’t want you to get into a car crash if you start a coughing fit behind the wheel” she offered. He smiled weakly at her and nodded keeping sure that he kept his tube hidden. She smiled at him and held out her arm for him to take once he got down the steps then headed to the car. He got in with ease and she started it up while he put his seatbelt on after she did. A few minutes later they were pulling into the school parking lot. Adam got out after they parked and waved goodbye to the nun as she pulled away. He wrote a note down to her about when school ended and she had told him she would be there when it ended. He walked into the school with a smile on his face and went to his locker as usual. 

“Parrish!” Ronan shouted over the students in the hall as he marched over to the bald boy while wearing a frown on his face. 

“Where have you been? Gansey and Sargent have been worried sick!” he growled. Adam adjusted his scarf and quickly wrote something down and showed it to him. 

“You were sick? You could have at least told us so that we wouldn’t worry! I mean come on, what’s so difficult with sending one little text message?” Ronan demanded. Adam wanted to tell him that he was really sorry that he hadn’t sent him or Gansey and Blue a message about him being sick, in fact he was still sick but he wanted to tell them when he was ready. As Ronan scolded him for not telling them he was sick Adam kept feeling guiltier and guiltier until he couldn’t stand the angry scolding anymore.he shut his locker door and bolted for the bathroom. He sat down on the floor and set his stuff down beside him then began to cry. The only noise he could hear in the bathroom were his quiet sobs as he sat there on the floor crying. He wanted to  scream and shout but he couldn’t with the stupid tube in his throat, he sobbed even more until someone came into the bathroom. 

“Are you okay? What’s wrong? Can I do anything for you?” someone asked out of concern. Adam lifted his head to see a worried Henry Cheng. 

“Adam?” he said an crouched down at his side. 

“What’s wrong?” he wondered out loud. Adam took off his beanie and showed him while tugging his scarf down just enough to show him the tube. 

“Oh” he says sadly. Adam quickly wrote down his situation. He didn’t know why he did it, Henry was really nice and understanding when he told him. 

“How about we clean you up and get you something to drink, okay? How does that sound?” Henry asked kindly with a soft smile. Adam wiped his eyes and smiled back with a nod then got up. The two boys walked out after Adam put the beanie back on and readjusted his scarf. He got a drink and Henry held his books for him as they walked to class. Henry acted really supportive to him and even offered to drive him home. Adam declined and wrote down to him that a nun was going to pick him up after school. Henry nodded in understanding and set Adam’s books down on his desk and went to his own desk. Gansey walked into the classroom as Adam sat down and ran over to him to give his a bone crushing hug. It was really painful and made Adam squeak out in pain. 

“Richard-mann! You’re hurting him! Let him go!” Henry scolded and Gansey immediately released him. 

“Sorry, I was just happy to see him. Ronan told me that he had been sick. I’m just glad he’s back” Gansey said with relief. Henry looked at Adam in sympathy then looked back at Gansey. 

“You have no idea” he said and went back to his seat after giving Adam another sympathy filled look. Gansey looked confused for a minute then looked back at Adam and smiled. 

“Henry has always been very confusing but I think I can translate that as him being happy that you’re back” Gansey said with a smile. Adam nodded with a smile of his own, he knew what Henry meant but he couldn’t speak and he didn’t really feel like writing it down. Gansey sat down next to him and began writing. 

After his first few classes it was time for lunch. Adam, Henry, Gansey and Ronan walked to the cafeteria to get food. 

“Adam, are you alright? You haven’t spoken a word to us all day, did we do something wrong?” Gansey asked with a frown. Adam shook his head and smiled, no they hadn’t done anything wrong. The doctor and nurses told him to not speak for a few more days. 

“Then why don’t you fucking say something to us? Huh? Are we not good enough for you anymore? Are we not the kind of friends you want to have?” Ronan shouted with rage. Adam was so shocked at the outrage in Ronan’s voice that he flinched. 

“Right, well don’t expect me to be forgiving when you decide to come crawling back to us” Ronan snapped and stormed away. Gansey went after him, Adam wanted to cry. He suddenly doubled over and fell to his knees in a coughing fit. He put his hand up against the wall to keep him from falling over even more. Henry crouched next to him and produced a paper towel. He took it gratefully and coughed into it. Once he was done coughing Henry helped him up and together they went to the bathroom to clean up the blood Adam had on his scarf and chin. Henry  even volunteered to clean the excess blood that had dripped onto the tube protruding from Adam’s neck. While Henry was doing that tears escaped Adam’s eyes. 

“Hey, it’s okay. Ronan just needs some time to cool off.” Henry said kindly with a soft smile. Adam got out his notepad and wrote down that he just didn’t want to worry them. Henry nodded in understanding.

“Yeah I get that, but you can’t keep this a secret from them forever. You’re going to have to tell them one way or another.” Henry informed him. Adam nodded, he was really nervous about telling them so he wrote down on his notepad asking Henry if he could tell them for him. 

“Yeah, of course. I’d do anything for you dude, you can count on me!” Henry said with a salute. That made Adam smile, he could always count on Henry and his friends to cheer him up. They made their way out of the bathroom and parted ways for their next classes. Adam took a deep breath and walked into class. Ronan was in the far back corner with his headphones on and his eyes closed wearing a scowl on his face, he also had his arms crossed. Adam set his stuff down at his desk and went over to him with his notepad. He tapped Ronan on the shoulder, Ronan opened one eye then shut it again. Adam quickly wrote down that he was sorry that he couldn’t talk to him and tapped him on the shoulder again. Ronan didn’t even open his eyes that time and kept ignoring him. Adam tore the paper out of the notebook and set it on Ronan’s desk then went back to his own desk and sat down. He felt like crying again because Ronan was giving him the silent treatment. Suddenly something hit him in the back of the head. He looked down and saw a wadded up paper ball. It was his piece of notepad paper. He picked it up and unfolded it. 

_ ‘Yeah right, if you were really sorry you would actually talk to us’  _ Ronan had written. Adam felt his eyes tear up and he started to cry. He got up and started to walk out of the classroom but his foot caught someone’s foot and he went down. His books scattered everywhere and he went into a coughing fit. He quickly grabbed a tissue and coughed into it. Someone snatched his beanie and revealed his baldness. Everyone laughed at him, except for Ronan who just sat there shocked. Adam cried and tried to get his beanie cap back but everyone kept tossing it back and forth until finally someone snatched Adam’s scarf and tore it away from him. Everyone went quiet and Ronan’s eyes widened as his mouth formed an O shape. Adam grabbed his scarf and beanie then ran out of the classroom crying. He tore out of the school and ran to sit by the tree beside the parking lot. He put his beanie on and wound his scarf back around his neck and just sat there with his knees up to his chest and his arms wrapped around them while he leaned up against the tree and sobbed. He sat there for a few hours and checked his phone every few minutes, there were some messages from Gansey and some from Henry, but there were none from Ronan. He looked up from his phone after those few hours and saw his car pull into the parking lot along with the nun behind the wheel. He got up and hoisted his backpack onto his back and got into the passenger side when she stopped for him. 

“How was school, Adam?” she asked him. He looked down at his knees with a frown. 

“That bad? Don’t you worry, once we get back to the church you can take a nap and I’ll call the school to inform the teachers and your school principal about what happened, ou just need to write down what happened so I can tell them, okay?” she offered kindly. Adam looked up  and smiled sadly at her. She wasn’t a regular nun, she was like a mother to him in a sense. When they got to the church a car was in the parking lot, it was a small blue buggy. The nun helped him into the church and Adam looked around for the car owner, who he saw was not what he was expecting. His mother was sitting in one of the pews with her head bowed in a prayer like way. Robert was nowhere to be found. She rose her head to meet his gaze. Her eyes widened at the sight of him. 

“Adam? What are you doing here?” she asked out of curiosity and stood. The nun helped him walk over to her since he felt like his legs were going to give out from beneath him. 

“Adam lives in the apartment here above the church” the nun informed his mother. 

“What’s wrong with him? Why doesn’t he speak for himself?” she snapped.

“He’s been diagnosed with a rare form of cancer that has infected his lungs and throat” the nun said sadly and let him sit down in one of the pews. His mother’s eyes widened and her hands covered her mouth. When she took them away she was wearing a frown and a sad look in her eyes. 

“Why didn’t you call me?” she asked with sadness filling her voice.

“He didn’t want to worry anyone, the doctors say he shouldn’t speak for a few more days at least until he gets the tube out of his throat” the nun informed her. His mother looked confused. 

“What tube?” she demanded. Adam put his hands on his scarf and started to unravel it carefully from his neck. She gasped when it was fully off. Mrs. Parrish ran over to him to look at the tube protruding from his neck. She looked truly worried and concerned as she inspected it, she met his gaze and looked to his beanie. 

“Let me see your head” she commanded and he obliged by taking his beanie off to show her his now bald dome. She gasped and brought her hand to meet her mouth once again, tears spilled out of her eyes and down her cheeks as she sobbed. 

“I’m so sorry Adam, if I had been a better mother then you wouldn’t be going through this right now, you would’ve had a better childhood!” she cried softly and sank to her knees. It wasn’t her fault, she didn’t know. Nothing could’ve stopped this from happening, nothing could’ve changed his situation. He smiled softly at his now sobbing mother and put a hand on her shoulder to tell  her that he was going to be okay. 

“He doesn’t believe it was your fault, there was nothing that could’ve or would’ve changed his situation, miss. He doesn’t blame you for his childhood, but I think you should spend the time he might have left with him. Get to know him better, he’s a tough young boy, he will fight this. Besides, he needs all the support and faith and hope he can get right now” the nun told her kindly. He agreed with her, he wanted to spend the time he had left with his mother and friends. His mother nodded and brought Adam in for a hug then dried a few of her tears. He quickly wrote down that it was okay to cry, he was going to be okay. She read it and smiled while crying some more. 

“Why don’t we go out to eat okay, we can get you some ice cream or pizza. Then we can go see a movie, okay?” his mother asked. He smiled at her and nodded. He wrote down that Nino’s was the best and cheapest pizza place in town. She smiled at him after she read the note and nodded. 

“If that’s where you want to go to eat then let’s go!” she said cheerfully but sadly at the same time with a soft smile. They got up and walked to her car after he put his beanie back on and his mother had readjusted his scarf. A few minutes later and after some confusing directions they were at Nino’s. The pair got out of the car and they went inside with Adam holding onto his mother’s arm while smiling. Adam loved his mother, even if he didn't show it all that often, he loves her and he was sure that she loved him all the same. 


	3. 'goodnight moon'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> where Adam's mother reads 'goodnight moon'

After they went to Nino’s and saw a movie Adam was tired and exhausted, though that might have been one of the side effects of having a rare form of cancer. Adam’s mother helped him up the stairs and into his little apartment above St. Anges church. As Adam settled into his bed to go to sleep after he took off his beanie and scarf, his mother pulled out a book from his book case to read to him, as she did almost every night when he was a kid and his dad wasn’t home. The book was called ‘goodnight moon’, one of Adam’s favorites as a child. 

“Would you like me to read this to you tonight, my sweet little boy?” his mother asked. He always loved it when she read to him so he nodded his head with a smile. She smiled and sat next to him on the bed then opened the book and began to read. 

“In the great green room 

There was a telephone

And a red balloon 

And a picture of The cow jumping over the moon 

And there were three little bears sitting on chairs

And two little kittens

And a pair of mittens 

And a little toy house

And a young mouse 

And a comb and a brush and a bowl full of mush

And a quiet old lady who was whispering “hush” 

Goodnight room 

Goodnight moon 

Goodnight cow jumping over the moon 

Goodnight light 

And the red balloon 

Goodnight bears 

Goodnight chairs 

Goodnight kittens 

And goodnight mittens

Goodnight clocks 

And goodnight socks 

Goodnight little house 

And goodnight mouse 

Goodnight comb 

And goodnight brush 

Goodnight nobody 

Goodnight mush

And goodnight to the old lady whispering “hush” 

Goodnight stars 

Goodnight air 

Goodnight noises… everywhere” she said softly and Adam began to slip into peaceful sleep, but not before he heard his mother say, “Goodnight my sweet little boy, I love you.” 


	4. Shopping carts and confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ronan finally tells Adam how he feels about him.

Adam woke up to the sound of someone knocking on his door. He glanced over at his clock, it was eleven o’clock at night. He groggily sat up and put his beanie on over his head then wrapped his blanket around his shoulders like a cape and shuffled to the door. He opened it a little a peered through the crack to see and nervous Ronan Lynch. 

“H-hey, c-can I stay here tonight? Gansey kicked me out of monmouth for the night” he said while looking a bit… shy. Adam opened the door some more and smiled at him. He smiled back… but softly, as if he could smile so sharply it could break him, but that wasn’t possible. Adam had always liked Ronan, sometimes even more than a friend but he knew that Ronan couldn’t like him back in  _ that _ way. Adam closed the door once Ronan was in the small apartment. Ronan looked really nervous, it was as if he wanted to curl in on himself or shrink so he wouldn’t take up so much space. Adam didn’t mind his company, in fact he found it most enjoyable. Ronan started to chew on his leather bracelets (he always did that when he was nervous) Adam hated it when he did that, not only was it unsanitary but it also made Adam feel nervous too. Adam put a hand on Ronan’s arm to stop him from chewing the braclet’s. He stared into Ronan’s eyes, they were an icy blue. Adam loved Ronan’s eyes, they reminded him of a snowy day on christmas. Ronan stared back and a blush slowly creeped it’s way onto the tips of his ears. Adam wanted so badly to laugh at his blush but he remembered that he couldn’t due to the tube. Adam walked over to the couch and motioned for Ronan to sit next to him, Ronan did so without being told twice. Ronan had a leather jacket on and his own beanie hat sitting upon his head. Ronan fidgeted with his bracelets then let out a long shaky sigh. 

“I’m sorry for getting mad at you today, I was being a stubborn asshole” he said softly with a hint of a genuine apology. Adam smiled sleepily at him and shrugged then got his notebook off the living room table and wrote down that it was alright, Adam should’ve told him when he’d first found out. 

“So… it-it’s really cancer?” he asked. Adam nodded, Ronan looked down at his feet. Adam quickly wrote down that it was going to be okay, he was going to fight it  no matter what. Ronan looked at him with a small smile but Adam noticed something about Ronan that he hadn’t seen before. Ronan was crying, Ronan was actually crying, Adam had never seen Ronan cry… ever. Adam brought up a hand to wipe the tears away that were falling down Ronan’s cheeks, then wrapped his arms around the broken boy in a hug. Adam held him for a while until Adam’s laptop started to beep. He walked over to it and saw that Blue wanted to video chat, he clicked the accept button. Blue’s face popped up on the screen. 

“ADAM PARRISH WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME FIRST!!!!” an angry Blue Sargent growled. 

“Sargent, go easy on him! He didn’t want to fucking worry us” Ronan growled back at her. 

“Lynch is there? Why?”

“Gansey kicked me out of monmouth for the night for being a dick, which is kind of ironic since his name is Dick Gansey the third” 

Blue laughed at that a little then stopped to examine Ronan’s face through the screen then her eyes widened. 

“Lynch, are you… are you crying?” she asked in disbelief. “I can’t believe it! Ronan Lynch actually has a heart!” she shrieked. Ronan looked like he was about to murder someone by the way he was glaring at Blue. 

“Fucking shut it Sargent, of course I have a damn heart!” he snapped. Blue rolled her eyes and looked back at Adam through the screen. 

“Adam take off your hat, I don’t like not seeing your hair” Blue ordered. Adam was hesitant, mostly because he was afraid she’d make fun of him for not having hair, but on the other hand Ronan had a buzz cut so it was kind of like being bald. He reached up and took off his beanie. Blue gasped, Ronan looked at him with sadness filling his eyes. Ronan shuffled over to Adam and ran a hand over Adam’s bald dome, his hand felt cold. Once Ronan took his hand away Adam lifted a hand to the blanket that was wrapped around him. He removed the blanket to show them the tube that was occupying a hole in his neck. 

“Oh Adam, I’m so sorry. You deserve way better than this” said Blue sadly. Adam looked to Ronan, he was trying to hold back tears, Adam knew it. Adam quickly wrote down on a sheet of paper that he and Ronan were going to go for a walk, whether Ronan wanted to or not. Blue nodded and hung up after a quick goodbye. Adam put his beanie back on and reached for his scarf, he was still in his clothes he had on earlier before he went to sleep. He tugged Ronan out of the apartment and out of the church. They walked for awhile until ronan broke the silence. 

“Um… w-why are we out here? I thought you’d want to sleep since I probably woke you up?” he questioned. Adam shrugged and kept walking, he was completely unaware that he was still holding Ronan’s hand until Ronan squeezed Adam’s. Adam smiled softly and squeezed back. Adam had an idea of how to cheer Ronan up, and it involved shopping carts. They had walked until Adam turned at the store and pulled Ronan to one of the shopping carts. Adam got in one and sat down with his knees up to his chest. Ronan looked surprised for a minute until Adam smiled at him. Ronan walked over to him and started to push the cart, it kept getting faster and faster and once it gained enough momentum Ronan hopped onto the back of it and they went spinning. Adam wanted to scream joyously as Ronan laughed happily. They kept spinning and spinning down the parking lot of the store until they hit the curb and tumbled to the ground. Adam couldn’t help it anymore, he laughed so hard but it sounded like he was being choked. He didn’t care, he felt happy.

“Parrish? Adam are you okay? Did the tube fall out?” Ronan asked in a panicked tone and rushed to Adam's side. Adam turned over onto his back and kept laughing so Ronan would know that, yes he was okay and no the  tube didn’t fall out. 

Adam stopped laughing a bit and smiled at Ronan. Ronan was smiling softly at Adam.

“I... Adam I need to tell you something” he started as his ears turned bright red. 

“When I met you the only word that came to my mind was… beautiful. That was the only word I could think of to describe you when I saw you for the first time, but now… after these few months of getting to know you I… I think I like you, like I fell in… love with you. I know it sounds weird but I do… love you I mean” he said sheepishly and looked at the ground to where Adam’s hand was. Ronan Lynch loved him?  _ Ronan Lynch  _ loved him. Holy shit, Ronan Lynch  _ loved  _ him! Adam had never been shown love by anyone, certainly not by his parents. Adam knew from that minute that he’d felt the same way all along, he realised that it was one of the things he was afraid of when he was going to tell them. Adam smiled softly and brought his hand to cup Ronan’s cheek and leaned forward. As he closed the space between them Adam made sure to look Ronan in the eyes as if to tell him that he’d felt the same, then he closed his eyes and found his lips on Ronan’s. Kissing Ronan was like the entire galaxy had erupted into thousands of millions of stars and fireworks, it felt like his heart was going to explode because if felt so good. No, it didn’t just feel  _ good _ , it felt  _ right.  _ Kissing Ronan Lynch was by far one of the best things that could’ve happened to him since finding out he had cancer, just the thought of it made him feel sad but it was quickly replaced by happiness, because Ronan made him feel happy. As Adam pulled away Ronan pulled him back in by cupping his hand on Adam cheek. For one of the first times in Adam’s life he felt truly happy.


	5. doctors appointment

Adam felt something warm slide its way around his torso, he felt skin on his. He moved his hand on top of the warm object only to find that it was a hand. The hand was connected to an arm and the arm was connected to his beautiful lover. Adam stared at his boyfriend in a fond and loving way. Ronan was so peaceful and gorgeous when he was sleeping, not that he wasn’t already gorgeous when he was awake. Ronan was like an angel, he was so beautiful. They had been dating only a few days but in those few days Ronan had stayed at Adam’s side. He was there when Adam had a nightmare in the night and Ronan crawled into his bed to comfort him with soothing words. Adam smiled softly at the memories, Ronan truly did love him. Adam was going to make sure he fought with everything he has to rid himself of the illness so that he and Ronan could have more memories like that. Why? Because Adam was determined, and nothing can stop a determined Adam. 

“I can’t sleep without you staring at me, can I?” Ronan said teasingly without opening his eyes. Adam smiled even more and felt his ears heat up in embarrassment but remembered that he was allowed to do that. Ronan cracked one eye open then the other one and smiled lovingly at him. 

“You excited for today?” he asked. Adam was excited because today was the day that the damn tube would come out and his throat would be sewn closed again. Adam nodded. 

“Good, I want to see you happy. We can go see a movie after, then we’ll go over to Gansey and Blue’s place to celebrate with cake and your favorite ice cream, double fudge chocolate ice cream with those sprinkles you like” Ronan told him. That just made even more happy.

“And I haven’t forgotten that you have chemotherapy today either so after you get out of surgery they’ll take you to the chemotherapy room for your treatment” he continued. Adam smiled at him, he could always count on Ronan to remember things he forgets. 

_ Knock knock knock _

Adam remembered that his mother was coming with them today to the hospital with them. 

“Here, I’ll get it. You just stay in bed until we need to get ready, okay?” Ronan said kindly and got up out of bed to get the door. He was in his black sweats and a black tank top, but he looked good in them. 

“... hi Mrs. Parrish. We were going to head to the hospital after we got dressed” Ronan said to his mother. 

“Okay, may I see him for a minute then I’ll wait for you two downstairs?” Ava asked. Ronan nodded and opened the door wider for her to step inside. 

“You two must’ve just gotten up, I can tell because it’s so dark in here. Plus Ronan seemed a  little sleepy when he opened the door” Ava tells him with a hint of laughter in her voice. 

“How’s my sweet boy today? Are you excited to be finally getting rid of that god forsaken tube?” she asked sweetly. Adam sat up and smiled at her and nodded as she sat down at his side. 

“Good, I don’t want to see you sad today. Because today is going to be better than what I could give you when you were younger. I’m sure Ronan has already explained the details” she stated happily. Adam found himself smiling even more. He hugged his mother, mostly because he was happy that she was there and mostly because he was nervous about how the procedure would go. He had read about how some procedures failed most of the time. His mother hugged him back in reassurance. Ronan came over and crawled on the other side of Adam and gave him a hug too. Ronan let Adam lay his head on his chest as he hugged him back after letting go of his mother. 

“Everything’s going to be okay, we will go see that movie I promised you, then we’ll go to Gansey and Blue’s for the cake and ice cream. Okay? Everything will be alright” his boyfriend said calmly. Ava looked at them fondly then got up.   
“You have a very kind boyfriend Adam, I’m incredibly proud of you sweet baby boy” she quietly cheered with a small, soft smile showing then headed to the door. Ava found out that they were dating when she walked into Adam’s apartment and found them snuggled up on his bed asleep, Ronan had his arms around Adam in a protective way while Adam had his head on Ronan’s chest.   
“I’ll see you two downstairs in a little bit okay?” she smiled and headed out the door.


End file.
